Month: May 2025

How would you tell the story of your parents and your early upbringing?

Well, that’s a question that Ron Howard and brother Clint Howard tackle in The Boys because both of the boys grew up on television—not watching it—but starring in programs that dominated the ratings in pre-streaming days. Ron, then Ronny, played Opie Taylor in the long-running Andy Griffith Show. Clint starred in Gentle Ben as the boy who had befriended a bear.

Later, Ron traded television—after starring in Happy Days—for filmmaking, a life-long passion. Clint continued in his career, becoming a rarity: a child star who matriculated into an adult actor, playing hundreds of character roles. Both were the sons of Jean and Rance Howards, both Oklahoma-born actors who migrated first to New York and later to Los Angeles.

Four Lessons

Without giving away key parts of the story, I will focus on four aspects of the book that resonated with me from a leadership angle.

The first lesson is craft. Rance Howard did not push either of his boys into acting; he opened the door for them, and each flourished in his own way. Since Ronny and Clint were acting before they could read, it fell to Rance to help them interpret their lines and get to the story’s truth. A technique that both mastered and Rance, in turn, shared with other child actors  — and adults, too — as a dialogue coach on many films and television shows, often when he had a small acting role himself.

The second lesson is persistence. Rance never made the big time, but he was a working actor his entire life. His work ethic as one seeking work and also writing screenplays provided an example for both boys. Although Ron succeeded as an actor, his true passion was film, and like any budding filmmaker, he had to go through hoops to succeed. Clint, too, persisted as a character, persevering through personal crises to continue working.

The third is lesson is brotherhood. Ron and Clint take turns telling their boyhood stories and their experiences. What comes through loudly and clearly, however, is the respect that each has for the other. Ron is five years Clint’s senior, a positive in that he broke ground that his little brother could use to his advantage. Clint had struggles with substance abuse, but neither brother gave up on himself or their relationship. Because Ron had married and lived on the East Coast, Clint became closer to his father after his mother died. The two continued running lines for acting roles right up to the final weeks of Rance’s death.

The fourth lesson is collaboration. Andy Griffith was a movie star turned television icon when he created the Andy Griffith Show. The fictional town of Mayberry was a nostalgic look at Andy’s own hometown, Mount Airy, North Carolina. The collaborative ethos on the set buttressed the community created on television. The Andy that Ron describes was kind, gracious and diligent. Andy worked as hard as anyone to make the show true to character and set an example through his work ethic. It was a family show that ran like a family in the sense that people pulled their weight for themselves and others.

The Final Cut

Given that The Boys is a memoir, some of the remembrances—although researched—may be biased. Not that there are dark sides not explored, but that what Ron and Clint remembered may not be the whole story. Not because they are hiding anything, but because they are telling their own story from their own point of view. “Memory is the diary we all carry within us,” wrote Oscar Wilde.

The Boys is more than a warm-hearted story. It’s an inside look at how to survive in a business that could be cruel without succumbing to it, but instead by maintaining a positive attitude through hardship and success.

First posted on Forbes.com on 3.01.2025

War is a writer’s medium.

Even in the age of instant imaging, the lasting expressions of war are those expressed by soldiers who have lived the experience. One of them is Bill Glose, poet-editor-author. Glose served in the Gulf War and is the son of a Vietnam War fighter pilot. His perspective is that of one who was in the war and knew first-hand the toll that war exacts upon loved ones waiting for their return. His experience is instructive for anyone in management who is exploring what it means to be aware of self and others you lead.

In an essay for The War Horse, Glose writes, “When I came back from Iraq, I carried with me the images of landscapes littered with ruined bodies. To deal with the stew of emotions roiling inside, I emulated my father, who never spoke about his experiences in Vietnam. Stoicism was his fortress. It became mine, too.”

“Silence,” as Glose writes, “had served as a tolerable stopgap when action ruled my world. But once I left the Army, I had too much free time to think. I’d seen reports about the high rate of veteran suicides—22 per day. I hadn’t considered taking my own life, but I often got angry at simple things, exploding in violent outbursts.” So, at the urging of a friend who was a poet, Bill began putting his war experiences into poetry.

Getting to the heart of the matter

Glose’s poetry, as seen in his second collection, Half a Man, has an immediacy that cuts to the quick. Glose shared with me in a recent interview that poetry is an ideal medium for expressing what soldiers are experiencing. “There are certain things you can do with poetry that you can’t do with prose. You can explore the emotional impact of issues instead of trying to pull the issues apart; you can focus on sensory details and visual imagery instead of having to give exact descriptions and fill in all the context. Essays and articles always seek to explain the why behind something. But ambiguity is fine in a poem. It allows you to explore painful subjects and ask questions you want to avoid without needing an answer.”

Glose continues, “Specifically regarding war, poetry, writing, poems about your war experience can be picking away a scab. It can hurt at first, but each time you rip it off, the scab shrinks a little bit, the pain diminishes, and then the skin beneath grows healthier. So it can be like a type of self-therapy, a way to face your traumatic experiences instead of burying them away.”

State of Fear: There and Here

In 2022, Glose recently published his first work of fiction, All the Ruined Men, as a means of widening his lens on the war experience. “Poetry is great for exploring these tiny moments, but I wanted to look at the lives of soldiers completely. I wanted to see what it was like for them before and during war and then mostly afterwards how the war had changed them.”

“Many books are written about the horrors of war,” says Glose. “I wanted to write about how difficult it can be to come home afterwards. So that’s what All the Ruined Men is about. It follows a single squad of paratroopers in the 82nd Airborne after they’ve served in numerous combat tours and now they’re coming back home and trying to adjust to civilian life. And they each have a difficult time of it.”

So often, as we discuss soldiers in combat zones, we overlook the toil it takes on their families. “Just like the soldiers are in a state of fear. Their families are in a state of fear, too. You don’t know exactly what’s going on over there. And anytime you hear about any action that happened, you always fear that your loved one was involved. And then, when they come home, it’s strange getting to know them again because they have changed so much. But the families, they’ve changed as well through this process of fear.”

 Helping Those Who Have Served

Civilians have images of war gleaned from what they see on television or read in books, but unless you have experienced war first-hand, it is wholly foreign. And some struggle to connect or re-connect with family members and friends who have served. Glose has some advice. “If you don’t know how to begin a conversation, ask them about some hijinks they used to get into. Ask [about] some funny story that you and your buddies got in trouble for. What’s something really stupid that you did?” Prompting with those kinds of light-hearted questions may get the veteran laughing. “That opens up that door to talk about more serious things.”

Glose is sometimes asked if reading or knowing about books depicting war will re-traumatize soldiers. “My thought is the same thing as how I changed my approach for my father. Nothing ever gets better by ignoring it. Sharing these stories, letting them know they’re not alone. I think that’s a fantastic thing to do.”

War changes everything, especially those who fight it. Writers who have served may be called to find the truth of the experience. In their doing, we learn of war’s terrible lessons as well as its life-altering power. Writers like Bill Glose shape their experiences into poems and stories that illuminate the human condition, a valuable lesson for anyone in leadership.

For my LinkedIn Live interview with Bill Glose, click here.

First posted on Forbes.com 12.00.2024

Go ahead and panic.

Go outside and scream.

This advice was from Michelle Singletary, who spoke on NPR’s 1Aabout the angst and fear that many of us are feeling about the wavering state of our economy. Singletary is the nationally syndicated personal finance columnist for the Washington Post. She has held that post for more than 20 years, and for one good reason: She offers common sense.

And so her caveat to her comments speaks volumes. Don’t act on your panic.

Singletary’s advice is suitable not simply for consumers and investors but for anyone in a management position. The uncertainty we are feeling now is palpable. The economy seems in stasis. Job cuts to government employees fuel anxiety. Contracts are not being let. 

Angst is real

Employees in the private sector are looking over their shoulders. Am I next? They wonder.

No one—certainly not this leadership correspondent—knows what is coming next, but one thing I do know is that what will steady us now and enable us to meet the challenges of the future will be remembered. How leaders respond to the unease of those they lead now will be remembered. So, having lived through more than a few economic uncertainties, let me offer a few tips.

Take the temperature. What are people saying about the situation? 

Listen to your team. It’s easy to listen to what is said out loud, but it’s tough to decipher what is not said. When fear takes hold, people shut down. Read the room. Ask open-ended questions. Reveal what you are feeling. Make it safe for people to speak up.

Recognize their efforts. Compliment the team on what they have accomplished to date and can achieve in the future. 

Connect with your team

Will these steps—collectively or individually—improve the situation? No. Your leadership actions will demonstrate that you care, that you understand the issues and challenges, and that you know how they feel.

Decades ago, I witnessed an example of reassurance from a VP executive whose company was about to be purchased by a larger entity. It was a surprise move, and everyone seemed on edge except the VP. Straight out, he told employees that he did not know what would come next, but he did offer one assurance. He told the managers in the room to invite him to their regular staff meetings. He would listen and take questions. In short, he would be present.

Be accessible

Tough times are terrible to endure. For leaders, they have an opportunity to show their mettle for the benefit of those they serve. We cannot control the situation around us, only how we react to it. “When you have peace in yourself and accept, then you are calm enough to do something,” wrote the Vietnamese monk and poet Thich Nhat Hanh, “but if you are carried by despair, there is no hope.” In short, face the situation with a sense of calm and resolve to help yourself and your team persevere.

First posted on Forbes.com 3.22.2025

In a recent interview, Will Packer, a successful film producer, told Ayesha Roscoe, host of NPR’s Weekend Edition Sunday, that “healthy arrogance” can be a demonstration that you have something to offer. 

“Healthy arrogance is a supreme confidence that you walk into a room and it doesn’t matter how successful, powerful or important the people are in that room,” says Packer. “You realize that no one in that room is more important or more deserving of success than you. And not only do you belong in that room, but you have something to add to that room and that room is better because you’re in it and you can bring everybody in that room up typically by getting them to see the commonality and the values and the goals that you’re trying to attain.” Packer explores these ideas in his new book, Who Better Than You? The Art of Healthy Arrogance & Dreaming Big.

Packer’s comments are one of the best and most succinct definitions of a leader’s role and responsibilities. Packer is Black, and he knows the feeling that so many minorities and women feel in such situations. While some organizations may tolerate this sense of unbelonging, successful leaders do not let it prevent them from pursuing their goals. Such leaders believe in themselves and in what they can do. 

A key phrase in politics today is “performative,” that is, doing something for the show because it will seem good rather than acting upon on your convictions. Leadership, however, is an act because it is about working with others and—here’s the difference—for the benefit of others. Leaders show that they are working, as Packer said, for the common good. 

How to act the part

Leaders, as Packer stated, must own the stage and deliver on it. Here are some suggestions.

Know what you stand for, your purpose, and how you can apply it to your work. 

Believe in your abilities. Understand that you have skills that can be applied to the job. Show folks what you can do.

Find a common cause. The heart of leadership is bringing people together for a collective purpose. Explain the cause so it is crystal clear and viscerally understood.

Work the plan. Apply your abilities to help the team achieve the goals through their efforts. Celebrate their efforts and keep working.

Keep doing it

Knowing oneself, projecting confidence, building community and working together is essential. They are part of the leadership equation that must be worked on every day, letting the people you lead know what you stand for and what you are doing to benefit the organization.

Anne Chow, former CEO of AT&T Business and author of Lead Bigger, told me in an interview, “Because you want to perform better as an individual, as a leader, as a team, and you want to have a bigger impact. All of us, to some level, want to work on meaningful things and so we want to help people.” The common good becomes a rallying cry if you are willing to put your leadership act on the line.

“Confidence is a muscle and that you build it with success,” says Packer. “You build it over time after you work it just like any other muscle that you might have.” When a leader’s confidence is applied to achieving a goal with others on the team it is a positive force for good.